VIVA LAS VEGAS

well i did what i had to do and was able to maintain a certain about of dignity during the shoe show in vegas....i was able to keep up with the trade show pace and still have some time to play some music of my own after the day was done....my good buddy (brother ) kent and I was able to jam some tunes and that was one of the highlights of my trip.......you see it is not always about selling the worlds best sandals and shoes...it's about those moments during the day that makes dragging your body out of bed and facing the day head on ...it's that one moment that defines what separates just living from.....really being alive.....that one good belly laugh...that one good hug....that one good minute when everything is .....perfect in the world......that is all it takes ...when your body is fighting the fight it sure is good to know that so many people care about you and so many friends are truly there for you .......i am protected like the tree under the rainbow.....roots are strong....branches are reaching for the sky.........oh and by the way had a treatment yesterday.....not gonna lie to you ...it su..ks... and you feel like crap..however it means i am one step closer to the 1/2 way point.....monday and tuesday will end treatment two...yahoooo...then it's back on the road for this brooklyn cowboy.......

tom

MANY RIVERS TO CROSS

i always liked that saying..it has a special meaning to me these days....i always think about our ancestors on their journey through life and when they had to deal with hardships and problems how they managed to overcome them and hold their heads high...when they came to that river in their way how they managed to "cross" it and move on in life always amazes me......

the "rivers" we need to cross sometimes have a bridge that makes it easier for us to manage....however as was the case with our ancestors sometimes we have to figure out how to make it by building our own way across.......all of you and my family are my bridge across this river i am now wading through......i sometimes feel you pushing me across..stopping with me as i rest.....moving with me as the sight of the shore gets closer and closer.............i may be only 1/3 there however with so many people as my "bridge" you know i will make it ..

you know that i feel your hands on my back.....I know that my late ancestors are helping me along with the rest of you ...............................just wish they would lower the tolls a little........you see i forgot my e-z pass this round so i guess the lines will be a little longer than usual.....

in the meantime enjoy the day......smile upon the sun........tom

p.s thanks for the coments yesterday....truly was humbled by them

THE RIGHT STUFF

hello world....chemo foggy here and coming out of it little by little...trying to explain how one feels after a treatment is difficult because every person reacts differently and within a minute you can be feeling "normal" to feeling like crap in a flash........YOU TRY TO JUST PUT ONE STEP IN FRONT OF THE OTHER TO GET THROUGH THE DAY....maybe the blog should be called "one step at a time"...i pulled off going to work most of the time because heck those who know me know i do not like to take sick days especially when i would rather take days off when i am healthy....looks like i still plan on hitting the road July 25Th to a trade show in Vegas and that will be a monumental task at best ...........so here's to "The Right Stuff" in your life to get you through ..............thanks for the love ...........tom

HONORED

well like i said before ...life is full of wonderful moments and to see all my old school mates on my blog comments is just one of those moments..............it is like finding a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow... .... my journey of life is full of amazing days that the memories of those moments get me through these tougher time,...........

had two treatments already and the third is tomorrow..(wed)..............feeling ok although yesterday was a doosey.........my beautiful cousins (and i do mean beautiful) came all the way from NJ to sit with me during chemo .............their voices as i closed my eyes helped me relaxed as the chemo flowed through my veins on it's way to the spots in my lungs to seek and destroy them forever.............my dear cousins barbara and loraine........thank you so much for taking the time to see me as i travel to the cure.............i will cherish those moments forever......

with so many people are pulling and praying for me i wonder if it would be possible to save some prayers for my beloved mets....... (oh yeah say a few for sue too)

....

tom

HISTORY OF CHEMOTHERAPY

YOU DID NOT THINK THIS SITE WOULD BE ALL FUN AND GAMES.......NEED TO PUT SOME SCIENTIFIC INFORMATION in once in a while..........round one starts MOnday....looks like tues and wednesday is also on the bill ..will let you in on it as i go through it......

Chemotherapy, in its most general sense, refers to treatment of disease by chemicals that kill cells, specifically those of micro-organisms or cancer. In popular usage, it will usually refer to antineoplastic drugs used to treat cancer or the combination of these drugs into a standardized treatment regimen.The first drug used for cancer chemotherapy, however, dates back to the early 20th century, though it was not originally intended for that purpose. Mustard gas was used as a chemical warfare agent during World War I and was studied further during World War II. During a military operation in World War II, a group of people were accidentally exposed to mustard gas and were later found to have very low white blood cell counts[2]. It was reasoned that an agent that damaged the rapidly growing white blood cells might have a similar effect on cancer. Therefore, in the 1940s, several patients with advanced lymphomas (cancers of certain white blood cells) were given the drug by vein, rather than by breathing the irritating gas. Their improvement, although temporary, was remarkable.[3] [4] That experience led researchers to look for other substances that might have similar effects against cancer. As a result, many other drugs have been developed to treat cancer, and drug development since then has exploded into a multi-billion dollar industry. The targeted-therapy revolution has arrived, but the principles and limitations of chemotherapy discovered by the early researchers still apply. [5]

still awake?....oh well that concludes the educational part of the story.....tom

DRIVERS START YOUR ENGINES....

here we go again..there is nothing like a "metastatic urethral carcinoma" description showing up on your pathology report...couldn't be a " it's nothing or oops we made a mistake" but no mine has to be a positive test ...now i am a positive kinda guys (most of the time) but for once can't these tests be negative but noooooo......ok for those of you who need to get in the loop (if you do not want to be in the loop it is ok and it will not hurt my feelings)..those spots on my lungs that were showing up in my early ct scans started growing and after a needle biopsy ( i will fill you in on that in a later Blog) the cells turned out positive for cancer...( i am thinking of a new name for cancer..cancer is so negative)..maybe we should call it......lollipop or sunshine.... "hey i was tested positive for sunshine sounds better".....so chemo treatment starts soon......"put me in coach i'm ready to play"....i've survived much worse......so plan on this being anti climatic as compared to the "neo" moments.....they say the sequels are not as entertaining as the original....you can always go to the beginning and review the story....or wait for it to show up on the turner classic network.......either way enjoy the ride with me.....man if i lose my hair (ok no wise cracks)...that is gonna be a sight.......

tom......break-out the Tye dyed....i'm backkkkkkkkkkk

a day in a life

layla our new puppy

hello my cyber-world friends and family......well it still seems like this little part of my world has had an effect on some of you and you still enjoy reading me from time to time...well it was what kept me going in those darkest and brightest of times.....in some ways i am exactly the same person i was before the big c-entered and then was ripped from my body.....but in other ways i have changed a little........I cannot put my finger on it exactly yet and will spend the next few blogs and months trying to figure out exactly how I have changed...so if you have any ideas or observations on why i am different i am up for the listening......here is a list of things i still do like i always do.....1. still feel i give people respect (even if they do not deserve it) because after all they are clueless to that fact....2. still like a good laugh now and then...3. music and my mets are still apart of my life...4. when i look up at the sky at night i am still as amazed as when i was a little man....5. my close friends are closer than ever...5. i still pull the ball in softball....... 6.oh yeah I still play softball....well i will think of more as the summer goes on........here are some of the ways i have changed...1..food is more of a burden than a joy......2. well having a neo-bladder is ..different...3....after 2 beers i am full...4.seems like i am tired more than before....5.....let's be honest the people i say i give respect to and don't deserve it ..... well they are getting on my nerves more and more.......6. when i laugh....well it is hard to describe..it is not totally back yet where i can say where it was before....and that i am working on......expect more from me in the next few weeks

tom

REUNION

shallow jr high

just imagine not seeing some childhood friends for over 40 years and then meeting in a restaurant in NYC on a friday night.....well my brother and I did just that...it was everything i expected and more.......i mean 40 years is a long time.......and the one thing that remained the same with all of us was our eyes...that was the first thing i recognized we we started to feel each other out....all we had to go by were memories and old photos.....we meet about a dozen old mates and it was as if time stood still on us....it did not take long for the girls to huddle together and the guys to smile and hug..( yeah guys could hug to you know)....... when my dear friend michele started to laugh i remembered that laugh as if it was yesterday.......photos, year books, good food and drinks.....and old classmates..... priceless......it will go down in my book as a night to cherish ......although were were there to celebrate our 7th -9th grade class ( we skipped 8Th) and to figure out a way to launch an even bigger reunion.. to some of us it put a closure on the mystery as to how everyone was doing and for that I will be forever grateful that i made that trip.....

tommy

spring time for hippies

well looks like we made it through another winter...it seems like the older we get the colder it feels even with a snow less winter (at least in NY) i know some of you got walloped (cartwright).....i mean long-johns were part of my everyday routine.....ummm should i wear white or white?...anyway looking forward to putting those away and breaking out a pair of shorts...

I have another useless trivia for you ....it is the earliest Easter since i think 1909...and i wonder what that year was like..when i was young i always thought the Early 1900's were in black and white because that is the only photos i remember seeing.....

i wish you all the peace you can handle in your lives.......enjoy the coming warmth.....make your time on earth light the way for others.....Happy Easter and Happy Purim....

tom

daylight savings

you just gotta love the extra hour of light ....it does kinda throw you off a little ....hope all is well with all out there in cyber land...had a great phone call from an old friend from grade school and jr high...looks like we are trying to put together a Reunion of sorts and it is cool tracking down old friends...i volunteered to help and even located my best buddy from that era...we talked for over an hour just catching up ..it was about 20 years since we spoke and he is a grad pappa already......sure glad lois from that speciall group of friends gave me a call and excited to see who we are able to locate....oh yeah i did locate someone else from that crowd but my twin brother does not count since i see him all the time..hehehe

well health wise we are trucking along.....always in the back of our minds..but never seems to hold us back......enjoy the warming weather.......make your days spectacular.......

tc

CLEAN BILL

ok time to get on a soap box....i feel real lucky these days....my body is getting back that spark that i have been mis-firing on since the walk began.....i feel real lucky these days.............my brain is enjoying the new clarity it is feeling and sharing with the rest of my body...i feel real lucky these days.....i heard of some horror stories of my cancer left untreated and where i would have been if not for a piece of paper turning a different color.....that was the turning point.....a little dip and wham.......buckle up and hang on for the ride.... i feel real lucky to have all of you in my life.......bar none the biggest reason why people survive these life altering situations is the support and love they recieve....and for that reason alone...I am the luckiest man that has ever walked this earth.......

heading back out on the road tomorrow ..will check in soon.....

tom

THE ROAD IS CALLING

well after a quick trip to a trade show in orlando to get my feet wet ... i am hitting the road for about a week or so starting in atlanta tomorrow (sat 1/19)and then heading to Utah......the salt of the earth.......i have to tell you it is getting a wee bit rougher to be on the road...but i still love it ...in quoting dan fogelberg (whom we just lost.. sad day indeed)..."the audience is heavenly...but the traveling is hell"............ i love seeing my brothers and sister of the road.........i love the thrill of the trade show and i swear there is a TV show in this way of life....i have to pitch it someday ......what goes on at trade shows is like no other business on earth ...it is the closest thing to the markets of the olden days ....buying and selling ...making it or breaking it.......just look for me on the selling side...and oh by the way i will be the one doing all the talking ...well because that is what i do....
peace.............
tom

BRING IT ON...2008

well i was thinking about a new way to say happy new year and with a little help from word perfect i came up with some new ways of saying it..... so have a joyful, content, blissful, exultant, ecstatic, cheery or delightful new year either way it is from the bottom ...no from the top...ahh.... make that from my entire heart....i wish you all nothing but a peaceful and loving 2008 (oh and by the way it is going to be real easy to convert the 7 into an 8 when we write the wrong year for the first few days).... oh how the little things in life get me through..

like i said in the begining ......BRING IT ON........

...P.S .... craig (naot) & joel (fad)..we shall walk with you in your fight.......and fight with you in your "walk in the park"

peace
tom

2007.....WHAT A YEAR

first off i just want to wish everyone on the planet a joyous and spectacular Christmas and new year and belated Hanukkah......forget all the hype and and pressure and really enjoy what is going on around you .....i still forget to do that sometimes and i really do want to enjoy this time of year ...hey i know its cold and wet in NY and not easy to be comforted in these crazy times....however we must understand that life is truly a remarkable gift.. and not just a gift under a tree or after lighting a candle...as this year winds down another chapter in my life is coming to a close....i cannot wait until the next one begins.....in the words of michael douglas in romancing the stone ..." whooooo what a ride"..........cannot wait to see what is in-store next year.....because if this is all that is gonna be thrown at me ................man what a piece of cake.......

my dear friends and family who seem to still check in once in a while........rock on..live on....make a difference......a special shout out to all the loose lucy gals this holiday season......you really do make a difference in peoples lives.....tom

"MAY THE ROAD RISE TO MEET YOU"

I was going to say things that we already know ..that this is a time to take hold of what we have ..who we are.... and be thankful for all the good in our lives.....it really seems that this journey of life has amazing highs and crazy lows for so many people i have been fortunate enough to cross paths with.....i do know this and i speak from my heart....there is a connection that has happened that allows me to continue understand the true meaning of what love and friendship means...we sometimes take for granted even the breath that we are allowed to breath...we sometimes take for granted the food that we are being fed...we sometimes take for granted the love that is given our way....but i do know this ...i have tasted your love and friendship to the max and each and every time you have risen to join me in my battle to remain on this planet..you have lifted my spirits by your continued love ,cards, phone calls and e-mails..i did not know if i would ever feel like myself again...but there is a new bounce in my step these days....there is a new light at the end of my tunnel and all of you have been holding the flame........thank-you from the bottom of my heart and neo- bladder.....

tom......146 lbs and gaining.....turkey here i come........

ANATOMY OF AN ILLNESS

sounded like a good title to me...well i did get home on saturday and i tell you 5.5 days in a hospital is just about the perfect time...i mean any more and well let's just say we would have to go there this time.....surgery went well ..my intestine was twisting around inside me due to some scar tissue that formed on the outside of the intestinal wall and attached itself to some other part of my body ....freaky stuff.....the area behind the twist was severly swollen 6" had to be cut out and that will take some time to calm down so i should feel "normal" in about three months.......in the meantime....... i am real sore..how sore you ask..well like i just finished telling one of my bestest friends in the whole wide world...it only hurts when i sneeze,cough,smile,walk,sit,run,ride a horse, a minibike, or regular size bike, swing a bat,catch a football, play my guitar (no that hurts other peoples ears),yodel,canoodle,skinny dip,mountain climb, change tire, and lastly high five just about anybody with a little gusto......

what gets me when all this started...my intestine was perfecly fine....and then i kinda asked it if it would not mind if we ripped some of it out to build me a pouch ....i mean come on can you imagine how humilated it felt ...this was one way to get back at me i guess.....will hopefully i learned my lesson and will leave it alone for a while...untill next time
Tom

GREETINGS FROM SLOANE..PART 3

this will be short and sweet....surgert went very well....intesines were VERY dialated (stretched open) causing my food to hang around to long in the tube...this was caused by scar tissue that twisted my intestine from th eoriginal surgery ( happens quite often).....all looks good from here..a little weak and getting stronger daily....thanks for the visits call and e-mails...means so much to me.....i am just so glad i have all of you in my world......
tom...should be home soon

THE JOURNEY CONTINUES

my favorite flower..birds of paradise

hELLO ALL,

well it looks like the rumour is true ..i need some more surgery...scar tissue is building up in my small intestine and if nothing else they will try to clear that up so i can get back to living normally...it has been quite uncomfortable some days in the digestive area...it appears that my intestine behind the blockage has fallen asleep and causing me all sorts of problems...well it is time to wake it up ..or take part of it out....let's get on with it......

surgery is monday the 29th...at Sloane kettering....will try to update from there.....

looking foward to all expenses paid vacation in nyc......round the clock nurses....room service.....i don't even have to take out the garbage....they not gonna know what hit them.....i am returning to the scene of the crime...........( man i bet the insurance companies hate the cheffo name....

see ya ..tom

516-946-1134...cell

e-mail thunderbyd@aol.com

...

ANNIVERSARY..........

2007 leukemia fund raiser "walking tall for the cure" over $4,500 raised

oct 13 2005.....the day i was told i had cancer......

i still remember those words like it was yesterday....."mr. cheffo, we have even a bigger problem you are going to have to have your bladder removed......but the good news is we are going to be able to replace it with a piece of you intestine"..you can only imagine my reaction " are your freakin kidding me" was what i think i said.....well two years have gone by and i would be amiss if i didn't mention it here in the very format that got me through most of the dark days...you see when i was able to write about my day it took a huge load off what my body was going through....i still remain humbled in the reaction and support of family and friends...

well i am here to say that my NEO_BLADDER is working fine although i am still not gaining weight (due to the fact that scar tissue has built up in my intestines) that is a conversation for my next blog....(looks like they need to go back in to fix it)...stay tuned for PART ll OF "MY WALK IN THE PARK"...............part one was such and adventure part ll is gonna be a piece of cake........

all my love

tom.........

I'M BACK

well it has been a longgggggggg road trip 6 trade shows...two footwear clinics all in 7 weeks... and i still have the energy to type this out......i have come a long way...but enough about me....just kidding.....ct scans this week are on the plate.....gotta keep getting checked out ........so i am getting on the soap box again ..please get a check-up yearly it is still the best way to beat this thing.....if you are feeling a little off take the time to figure out what is wrong......if you don't like your doctor ..find a new one......if you need advice just ask....i am living breathing proof that early detection saves lives.......don't ignore a lump and think it will go away......wear sun screen...give up cigs.....drink less and love more.....or is it drink more and love less...ahhh i forget.......october is the month i was diagoneed almost two years ago.......what a long strange trip it has been.........live......love.....long.....

tom